1. When you look at yourself in the mirror, what's the first thing you look at? the endless vacancy staring back that has been hollowed out by all the drugs and meaningless sex I've been having.
  2. How much cash do you have on you? My trick kicked me out of the car in Bed-Stuy wearing only my underwear and a tshirt. No cash, but a laptop.
  3. What's a word that rhymes with "TEST"? Budapest, as in that time I was kidnapped by gypsies, tramps, and thieves.
  4. Favorite plant? That one at my Grandmother's house when I was a kid. I wonder how it is doing now.
  5. Who is the 4th person on your missed call list on your cell phone? the angel Gabrielle
  6. What is your main ring tone on your phone? Coldplay's Clocks. It is still the one I always go back to because it has the kinds of tones and pitch in it that I can hear.
  7. What shirt are you wearing?multi-stained 3 day old one
  8. Do you "label" yourself?My label says "Do Not Remove by Penalty of Law"
  9. Name the brand of your shoes you're currently wearing? I have a foot fetish
  10. Bright or Dark Room? I use a digital camera.
  11. What do you think about the person who took this survey before you?I won't judge you because of that abortion you had in high school.
  12. What were you doing at midnight last night? suppressing my emotions through forced sleep
  13. What did your last text message you received on your cell say?Me too. I hope I can make it through this weekend."
  14. Do you ever click on "Pop Ups" or Banners? I enjoy "Pop Ups"
  15. What's a saying that you say a lot?" There are stairs around the corner to the right."
  16. Who told you they loved you last? the ange Gabrielle.
  17. Last furry thing you touched? I wanted to touch something furry last night, but it was only a first date. Maybe on date 2 then, if there is one.
  18. How Many Drugs Have You Done In The Past three Days? I get a constant waifting of paint fumes at my office.
  19. How many rolls of film do you need to get developed?I think you can freeze embyoes in flim containers.
  20. Favorite age you have been so far? 29 is good, so far. I live in the present.
  21. Your worst enemy? Magda Foxglove, also an assassin in my office group.
  22. What is your current desktop picture? The poster to Brokeback Mountain.
  23. What was the last thing you said to someone?" Yesterday, I chose the cleanest pair"
  24. If you had to choose between a million bucks or to be able to change a major regret?I have no regrets. Always choose the million.
  25. The last song you listened to? The theme song to Gilmore Girls


  1. First thing you did this morning? Touched something furry.
  2. Last thing you ate? Ice cream and cookies.
  3. Is your cell phone a piece of crap? I think it is a silica based polymer.
  4. What's the thing you look forward to most in the next 6 months? Spring Break.
  5. What's annoying you right now? a few regular Johns.
  6. What's the last movie you saw in a theater? John Waters' "A Dirty Shame"
  7. Do you believe in long distance relationships? Gay men can't date beyond 10 blocks.
  8. What's Worse? a) getting hurtb) people not being real with youc) not getting everything you try so hard forArent these all the same?
  9. Is there someone you miss?I hate everyone today.
  10. What inspires you? Kanye West
  11. If you could put together a concert of 5 bands or artists, who would you choose? Jay-Z, Kanye West, Belle and Sebastian, the band doing the Gilmore Girls theme
  12. Song that sums up your love life? Black Eyed Peas' My Humps
  13. What's one thing you wish you were better at doing? Silent Assassination
  14. If you could be anywhere this second, where would you be? Sleeping, in a real bed.
  15. What's your most vivid memory from 6th grade? Learning what masturbation was.
  16. Latest addiction? Milky Way
  17. Have you ever had the slight urge to kill someone? Always, I am an assassin
  18. How many people would you say were interested in you? There was never interest, just use of holes.
  19. What do you love doing? Eating dinner with Sandra Bernhard
  20. Do you think someone thinks about you daily? If a tree falls in the woods and no one is there to hear it, does it make a sound?
  21. Who was the last person you saw or talked to? the angel Gabrielle
  22. What do you want to be when you grow up? Someone who can find keyholes in the dark.
  23. What is your favorite food? Pickled Soy-Herring.
  24. How many people do you know with the same name as yours? The knowledge of infinity is an impossible achievement.
  25. What was the last thing you spilled? seed.

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